There are prefect and beautiful girls out there. The drop dead gorgeous, perfect face, hair and body kind. And then there is me. I have none of those.
Im just ordinary with not particularly great looks or a personality I can be too proud of. I have no greater aim or calling and if I do I dont think I will get there cus I dont have the face for it. The only thing good about me is the fact that Im a bloody brilliant actress. I put on a mask every single day and nobody spots the act. They see a strong, confident woman with her priorities in place and head screwed firmly on her shoulders, never a woman who’s shattered on the inside and groping for her confidence and identity in the darkness. The darkness is filled with so many cliffs and voids, Im afraid I will one day fall into one and lose myself so entirely, that all thats left of me will be my act. In this darkness and quest to find myself, the only thing I know is real for certain is my love for him. But when you hold on to something so tight, it becomes the defining point of your existance. What if one day this selfsame person realised that the person to whom he was the world was infact so fargone that he didnt want to help save her? What if one day he woke up and didnt find her beautiful anymore? What if one day he realised that she would never be as accomplished or amazing as those other girls?
With nothing left to gear her to reality what would become of her? Would she fall into the dark abyss or drown herself in the deep black waters of helplessness? Would she find herself or make the act her identity? The act has always been who she was. He shakes up her whole being to make her who she is. He is the anchor that helps her hold it together and also the knife that frees the anchor from its rope.
She will never be beautiful or as well accomplished as those other women. But she loves him with all she is and will ever be. He is the only person she attempts to explore herself outside of the act for and if he is the man she thinks he is, he wont let her go.

He isn’t going to be here for my birthday.

I wish he could.

"Nothing is more natural than mutual misunderstanding; the contrary is always surprising. I believe that one never agrees on anything except by mistake, and that all harmony among human beings is the happy fruit of an error."
- Paul Valéry, The Art of Poetry (via observando)


A quick look at: Imhotep.

While some might better recognize Imhotep as the possessed mummy from the Hollywood blockbusters The Mummy and The Mummy Returns, he was, in fact, one of the most renowned figures in Egyptian history for much more admirable feats.

An astoundingly talented man, Imhotep was the master builder for King Djoser, and built the famous stepped pyramid of Djoser at Saqqara (photo 2). Dating to before 2600 BCE, this pyramid is one of the first monumental stone buildings in the history of mankind. Certainly a milestone in the evolution of architecture, it is viewed as a forerunner to the more typical smooth-faced pyramids built during the great ‘age of the pyramids’ in the 4th Dynasty. He is also the first artist to have their name recorded anywhere in the world.

Imhotep has also variously been recognized as a poet, scribe, astrologer, vizier and as an influential doctor. He also served as the high priest of Re, and as the pharaoh’s official seal bearer. Following his death, Imhotep was deified by the Egyptians as the son of the god Ptah. 

In priestly wisdom, in magic, in the formulation of wise proverbs; in medicine and architecture; this remarkable figure of Djoser’s reign left so notable a reputation that his name was never forgotten.” -Egyptologist James Henry Breasted.

Images used: Seated Imhotep, bronze, dates between 664 and 332 BC and was found in Mitrahina, Egypt. Courtesy of the Walters Art Museum54.402. The photo of the pyramid of Djoser is by Olaf Tausch.

Just as a quick side note, consider the time span between the life of Imhotep who lived during the reign of Djoser (2630-2611 BCE) and the age of the shown statuette. This would be like us making artworks of a person who lived over 2000 years ago, not something that would typically be done unless that person was perceived to have been particularly remarkable and important to our history.

"A lover goes toward his beloved as enthusiastically as a schoolboy leaving his books, but when he leaves his girlfriend, he feels as miserable as the schoolboy on his way to school."
- William Shakespeare (via observando)
"I am not good at noticing when I’m happy, except in retrospect."
- Tana French, In the Woods (via observando)

Washed away like Sand

His promises were written on sand,
Your memories carved onto stone.
Of all the hectares found on land,
You made in his arms your home.

The tide came by, punctual to the second
Corroding its share of sand
It swept him away, wild as it is; Until
From yours was torn away his hand.

Your feet were buried under sand,
You stood still as you watched him go.
The one love that promised to stand by,
whether drowned in the depths or washed ashore.

The wave retreated,
and you searched frantically
For those words you had vowed to live by
Only to find your feet buried deeper
Forsaken, left with an empty life.

The stone still lives on,
Surviving the test of time.
You visit at sundown everyday that spot,
Where you once stood, complete
believing yourself stronger than distance and worldly might.

poem sea sand Water Promise trust

"Shock is a merciful condition. It allows you to get through disaster with a necessary distance between you and your feelings."
- Lisa Kleypas, Sugar Daddy (via observando)